They are at my house. Gnashing their terrible teeth and baring their fearsome claws. They are terrorizing the grown-ups with cries of "No, No, No, No, NO, NO!" and "I had it first!" interspersed with screaming and "J.T. hit me." "She hit me first!" Without pause we escalate into: "That's mine! Give it back!" Toys are being thrown. The smaller one, with the deceptively sweet face, appears to be in charge. The older, less aggressive one appears to be taking orders from her. One wild thing is chasing the other around the den while both are yelling at the top of their lungs. They are too wild for sleep! Adults are in full defensive mode. Attempts to calm the wild things with Disney movies is not working. Soon, they will resort to bribery. Candy will be offered in exchange for calm. Later bedtimes and no baths.
The parents long to retreat to the closet, but supplies of Diet Coke, Dr. Pepper and chocolate are running very low. The current plan is to distract them while we make a break for it. We are hoping to divert them toward grandma's house. Our other option is to put them up for sale on e-bay. No minimum bid required and there will be NO returns allowed! For at least one whole day, or until we have sleep and some quiet time.... or until we miss them, whichever comes first.
9 months ago