Friday, May 30, 2008

Spam... ALOT!

My Spam folder had 103 emails in it this morning. I just emptied it on Wednesday. Before I empty it I always scan the titles to be sure nothing I truly need has been accidentally sent to the Spam folder. Occasionally I find blog comments that for some unknown reason get "spammed." But usually, it is the same old same old.

Lowe's really, really wants to give me a free gift card. There is a person (or apparently an entire tribe based on the number I get) in Nigeria/Kenya/St. John who died and would LOVE to bequeath all his millions to me if only I fork over my name, social security number and bank account info. If I'm running short on money I can convert my "gold4cash". Cars! Cars! Cars! are awaiting my purchase and my credit score numbers are just a click away.

My absolute favorite are the repeat emails for "black singles". If ever a spammer DIDN'T know me. My flesh is the opposite of black. My skin would make Irish people feel tan. I could mime without the makeup (see previous post). My foundation shade is all the way on the left of the pale scale. Even then it looks a shade dark on me. I don't tan. My skin crisps to red, peels and turns the same ghost-white shade it has always been. If I wore black from head to toe, you'd think I was into the goth scene. But tomorrow, there will be an email in my Spam folder letting me know that the black singles scene is waiting for me to join.

12 comments:

peppermintpatcher said...

We have a fantastic spam service that captures all of those emails and the ones asking if I would like to increase my 'member'. It sends them as one email which I can delete easily.

alice said...

I have the neighbouring tribe, also all deceased. Maybe we could take over that part of the country ourselves? I mean, with them being all dead, and Us aving all that money and all....

Rob said...

My Dad had one of his antique tractors listed for sale on some website and he got an email from somebody supposedly in South Africa telling him that he wanted to buy his tractor but could only pay him with a $25,000 check. The tractor was only listed for around $4000. All my Dad had to do was deposit the check and then immediately wire the guy in South Africa the difference, he could even keep an additional thousand for all his trouble. Needless to say he just ignored it, but some people don't. Some people really believe that Bill Gates will indeed send them a thousand dollars for forwarding email.

You know Melinda, I never get SPAM about singles in my area....hmmmm???

I still think we should both get accounts at Match.com and see if they match us up.

Stomper Girl said...

I've got a drug pusher with my details, they REALLY want to sell me some viagra.

M said...

Oh, I think Goths are quite the go in the black singles scene. So, get yeself a black floor length dress and matching finger nails and go give em hell!

Melinda said...

Good point Alice. But I like my modern conveniences way to much to hack it in the real world.

Rob. We are certainly NOT opening that can of worms. What if there were a computer glitch and they don't pair us up?!

Black fingernails M? NEVER!

Fairlie said...

Rolexes...I seem to get offered a lot of them. And who knows what the Russians are tryingt o entice me with, given the 100s of spam e-mails I get from them are all in Russian.

A Spoonful Of Sugar said...

I can relate - I have just recently changed my email address and so am no longer getting 100+ emails a day asking if I want viagra!

Aunty Evil said...

Congrats on the lottery wins!

I get Russian girls sending me their pretty and oh-so-cute photos asking me for nothing but to love them.

I also get LOTS of spam written in a foreign language I cannot read.

I received an email just this morning from some poor soul called Madam Mary Harley who is offering to make me her beneficiary when she carks it from cancer in a few months time. She has also had a stroke, poor love, so I am very lucky she is still able to type. Anyway, apparently her hubby left her millions, she has no kids, and her in-laws are already stinking rich so don't need the money.

I feel so honoured to be chosen by this unknown dying woman that I immediately sent all of my details to her. She wants me to come to Germany, so woo hoo! I get a holiday as well!

Catch you later suckers!

Rob said...

Just wait until she meets you Aunty...I say it'll take less than a day before she disowns you.

Minnesota Matron said...

The Matron routinely receives penile implant spam. Yes!

Rob said...

Do a new blog already, I'm tired of seeing SPAM-a-lot.

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