Sick and Tired

I very much don't want my blog to become overtaken by cancer. This space is my little respite from trials and craziness. And I want it to remain that way. But this week has just been absolutely dominated by this illness.

Mother has had to endure three separate days of shots to boost her white blood cell count. Since white blood cells are generated in the bones, her bones have ached quite badly. She was given a prescription strength pain killer to which she had a very bad reaction. She did not eat and drank very little for 36 hours. Her hair has almost all come out and she is left with just little wisps of gray. She looks tired. Her spirit is flagging a little. All before her second dose of chemo today.

I wish, wish, wish I could snap my fingers and make her better. I wish she did not have to suffer. But if wishing could make things happen then you would already be a mother, your chest would have fixed itself on its own, depression would not have impacted your life, your child would still be here dancing and singing and loving. But that doesn't stop me from wishing and hoping and waiting.